How to live Aethili?A few weeks ago

nadiyashultana0

I attended an Eritrean Orthodox Christian and American Orthodox Jewish wedding in New York. Eritreans came from all over the country and the world. For two generations war and unrest had scattered them all over the world. The Eritrean women were dressed in their traditional white dress and a top known as a netsela; The men were sleek and serious in their black western suits. The wine glass was shattered; The Jewish family danced in a circle with folded hands; Eritreans perform a circular dance known as Kuta. The Jewish men placed the bride on a chair and lifted her up; Eritreans flocked to the temple. It was a complicated, beautiful day. Centuries of tradition came together.

The bride and groom met in America because special-data the war had torn apart African families and the Holocaust had torn apart Jewish families, all reinventing themselves in their newfound space. The umbrella carried at a Jewish wedding is called a huppah. It represents the haven for the newlyweds. The hoopa is always open at the sides, letting in not only light and air, but also people. Thus, the home of the newlyweds is shared, and the stone soup in it is shared. It recalls Abraham's camp where he welcomed guests and angels. Let your house be wide open, let all its sides be open to welcome passers-by. My side is Eritrean, although I am not Eritrean; My late husband was Eritrean.



His niece, who became my daughter, came to America at the age of sixteen to live with us. The war that kept her from being where she was, her mother said to me when I was pregnant with what I thought was my first child, "She's your daughter now," that's how life goes. Families expand, others' blessings and responsibilities seek us. When we leave our comfort zone, when we eat something different from the bread we grew up eating, a sense of discernment develops. Challah, chapati, hot cornbread, pita, injera, baguette—how wonderful it is to eat a different bread, a different type of savory food. How wonderful it is to sleep next to someone who is dreaming in a different language than yours.